Bristol Palin: The Hypocrisy Over Teenage Pregnancy
by lainad

About a month ago, I found out that my niece is pregnant, and I’m not proud of how I reacted to this news. In hindsight, maybe it is because when she was a teenager I told her, "Don't get pregnant or I'll break your legs." Granted, unlike Alaska Governor Sarah Palin’s daughter, my niece will be 23 next week and a college graduate, but despite living with the father of her child, she is unmarried.

One of the reasons I was disappointed in the news because she had just finally started a job in her chosen profession, and a year-long maternity leave for someone who is on contract doesn’t necessarily mean that job is going to be there for her when, or if, she returns.

What also bothers me is that my niece knows better. Her mother, my older sister got pregnant at 17. Despite having all the material trappings where one would assume might hinder such an ‘accident’ - just like Bristol Palin, my sister grew up in a two-parent, upper-middle class home – the new addition brought years of turmoil to our family, turmoil that despite my niece being an adult and living on her own, still lingers. While my niece was and is a wonderful, beautiful and intelligent woman / child, I remember the struggle that my sister went through, which included alienation from family members, the looks of disapproval and the financial and emotional struggle to make it on her feet. Most importantly, my sister, despite loving her daughter, was clearly far too young and immature to raise a child on her own. I was hoping that my niece would remember what her mother went through and perhaps she would wait until she got her career started, got some money in the bank and enjoyed her life as an adult before making such a life-altering decision.

I can totally understand the heightened media attention on Bristol because of her mother, but the water-cooler conversations, Dr. Phil’s baseless opines, the ‘fear’ from suburbanites who now feel that Cindy and Misty now might think that getting knocked up is ‘like, cool, dude.’ Funny, because when young black women get pregnant, they are called ‘Welfare Queens.’ There was a time when young Latina and black women were 'encouraged' to get Norplant and Depo Provera shots as health clinics in the ‘hood’ made contraceptives real easy for them to obtain. Some thought that it was the government’s way to deter unwanted people from having even more unwanted children, but hey I’m not much of a conspiracy theorist, but if the shoe fits……..  From Earnset Harris via The Huffington Post:

But where is that same sentiment or support for young black and Hispanic teen girls when they have babies? As I read someone else put it, when minority children have babies, it is an epidemic and a sign of the poor standards in our communities. When Bristol Palin has premarital sex and gets pregnant, it is to be applauded as a sign of how strong the family is because she will join the long list of teen mothers in this country. What a crock. These people should keep quiet from now on when black and brown teens have babies. They have no ground on which to stand after acting like this particular teen pregnancy is like a gift from God while minority teen pregnancies are the scourge of our society.

Now I must admit I do feel sorry for Bristol – a bit. She will be forced into a marriage that will probably not last, her mother has basically put her professional ambitions in front of her own child (Yes, I know that sounds bad, but whatever) and I say that because no pregnant teenage girl really needs or deserves that much public scrutiny. Lucky for her the child’s father is white! Could you imagine otherwise?  Mental Meanderings talks about the difficulty of young parents and suggests that maybe they are better off remaining living with the parents:

While we may mock Laqueesha who gets knocked up and she and her baby live with her Mama and Big Mama, in many ways this is a better solution to teenaged parenthood than sending two inexperienced  American children out into the world expecting them to successfully rear children with only their resources. A household of multiple adults, in my opinion, is superior to one with only one or 2.

I seriously debated over writing about this issue, as I really didn’t want to fuel the fire about Bristol’s pregnancy. However, a lot of bloggers are talking about the hypocrisy of the public response to her pregnancy and there are a number of interesting angles to these conversations. Blogger Reverend Dr. Renita J. Weems from Something Within talks about the hypocrisy among Evangelical Conservatives in relation to reproductive rights:

That Sarah Palin’s 17 year old pregnant and unmarried is no business of mine . But that Sarah Palin opposes abortion and the teaching of sex-education in schools, and has a 17 year old daughter who is pregnant, is very much my business. And the business of every woman who cares not only about the unborn, but the born too. You don’t get to profess to be opposed to abortion and then cut a line item in your state budget that would provide transitional housing for teen mothers in need of a place to live.  Where do unwed teens who don’t get to live in the Governor’s mansion or the White House go to live?

Have you noticed?: Black teens, like most teens, carry their babies to term, and they are blasted by conservative pundits  as immoral “welfare queens” for getting pregnant before marriage . Bristol Palin chooses, with her mother’s support, to go ahead with her pregnancy, and she is good Christian girl who deserves to be left alone.

Perhaps because of witnessing my sister’s experiences as a young black mother coupled with stories from many friends and acquaintances who have found themselves pregnant at a very young age, it frustrates me to see the hullabaloo surrounding Bristol, especially given how her mother once slashed funding to help pregnant teenagers.  One would think that the girl was the first white kid to ever get knocked up before marriage. It’s frustrating because when the young pregnant women I knew, there were not granted the public sympathy that Bristol has received, many of them got dirty looks from strangers and mutterings of ‘typical’ and ‘it figures.’

Because my niece is biracial, I am fearful that she will experience the similar judgments that her mother and the women I know have, that she will face difficulty with people taking her seriously because of her new status as a black single mother. I just didn’t want her to go through that, I wanted her to have more, but I realize as I write this, that right now I am judging her, perhaps I am one of the people that I am fearful about. I haven’t spoken to my niece since I heard about her pregnancy and perhaps the one good thing that has come out of the public humiliation of Brisotl Palin is that I now I will speak to her and try to mend fences. I now realize that maybe my niece didn’t ruin her future as much as I initially thought she had.

 

Submitted by lainad (view blog) on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 15:23

Comments

 

You touch on an interesting concern, Laina
...

Not just society's view on unwed mothers, but women who do damage to their careers because they miss out on the mindless but necessary face time necesary to get ahead. Though that may be a misperception. Women that I grew up with who had children early were more mature, and entered into more mature relationships after their children were born. I marvel at one of my best friends who had her brood of 4 before she was 30, starting with getting married at a very young age. The marriage didn't last, but she knows how to make her life work. Though I haven't figured out how this works for myself. I have seen women become even more effective in their careers by virtue of being mothers.

 

Jory Des Jardins
writes on business and career topics at BlogHer, and on her personal blog Pause

Submitted by Jory Des Jardins on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 13:00
 

Thanks for saying it

Let me just clarify right here- I have no judgement against Palin's daughter. I was sexually active at her age, too, and it is so easy to become pregnant. She must be scared to death and if I were to meet her in person I would hug her and try to reassure her in every way possible.

But this pregnancy makes me angry and this is why- it exposes a horrid double standard among the GOP and the "family values" crowd.

 Do we even have to wonder for a minute how the GOP would handle it if this was Obama's daughter? For years the GOP pundits have been envoking the image of the unwed, urban black female as the root of society's ills. Welfare, crime, nearly every social ill is laid at the feet of youngle black single mothers.

Yet when a Christian, white Republican unmarried teen become pregnant it is hailed as a marvelous gift from God, a testiment to the "values" crowd's bravery and courage to meet their responsibilites head-on.

 

Frankly, it makes me sick. And no, disscussion of the pregnancy and how it is handled is not "off-limits". This woman wears her views on pfamily planning on her sleeve and uses it as a selling point in her candidacy. 

 

 

Submitted by mamiel on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 13:21
 

Thanks

For an honest and thoughtful look at this issue.

It depresses me horribly when I see babies having babies, not the least of which our world just can't afford more babies that aren't carefully planned for in advance. There's no reason for most accidental pregnancies, either, other than our country is still too controlled by a minority of people who think honest discussions about sex are somehow evil.

I was appalled at the fiasco of bringing that young man to the convention. These two kids are far too young to know what love is, much less to be forced into some kind of marriage because of political expediency. 

Lastly, your point about how we deplore young blacks and hispanics getting pregnant but somehow applaud the same with families like the Pallin's is right on, and deserves broader discussion. Discussion you won't see at the RNC from what I can see of the audience.

 

Submitted by shelleyp on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 14:20
 

Bravo, Laina

This is an amazing post. Every point you hit on is so accurate; I remember that time when poor black women were encouraged to get Norplant and Depo - and it wasn't that long ago. My sister is a nurse, and while she was in nursing training, she had to request a transfer for her clinicals b/c she was so disgusted at the alarming rate doctors were pushing welfare recipients and women of color to tie their tubes. She was too scared and had a child of her own to support, or she would have made more of a protest. It's disgusting what happens to some women. 

Thank you again for bringing this up. Even beyond the Palin situation, this conversation is desperately needed. I'll continue thinking about it for quite a while, I think. 

 

Notions of Identity

Submitted by Laracolvin on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 14:38
 

Hypocrisy?

 I am one of those evangelical conservatives who's being accused of hypocrisy in this situation. I don't think you understand where we are on this issue.

First of all, I believe that sex outside of marriage is wrong. Therefore, I believe that Bristol and her boyfriend and your niece and her boyfriend made a bad decision and a morally wrong one.

 However, the baby that is one of the results of that decision did nothing wrong. What's more, the babies' parents, although they were wrong to conceive the children involved, made a good decision in not cutting off the lives that had already begun. Nobody's "applauding" Bristol Palin's decision to have sex outside of marriage. I am applauding her decision, and that of her boyfriend, to accept responsibility for their actions and for the new life that has been formed.

 Make no mistake, the majority of parents in the history of the world have been Bristol Palin's age or younger. She and her fiance have the support of family, and they will be just fine. At least, that's what people of good will would wish for her  and her family. ANd I pray that your niece is able to form a family and enjoy the baby that she has been blessed with, too. 

Submitted by Semicolon on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 14:44
 

Semicolon, Not that

Semicolon,

Not that hypocrisy.

The other kind. 

The kind where the Conservative Right has railed on unwed teens for decades, sneering at them and implying that their parents couldn't control them.

Bill O'Reilly calling the parents of a pregnant teen "pinheads" and condeming Glouchester High School for letting teens get pregnant and "out of control".

The kind were the Conservative Right has wanted to withhold funding for social programs for pregnant teens or sex education and wants to outlaw abortion or giving birth control to teens.  I belive the sentiment has been something like, "Well, it's their own fault if they get pregnant!  Why should WE have to pay for their kid?"

The hypocrisy that it is now okay for a well off, WHITE girl to be a pregnant teen.  But not a poor girl.

That kind of hypocrisy.

You know, the kind we hear when we hang out with some (some, not all) Evangelical Christians.

And I know about this, because I am one.

Submitted by miteegirl on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 15:52
 

Miteegirl, I keep reading

Miteegirl,

I keep reading posts where I nod and nod and go ummhmm and then I get to the bottom and your name is on it!  You are a good read for when I need to get my blood pressure under control from all my reading, and youtubing and CNNing etcetera.

What I am getting out of the past couple weeks is that tolerance is such an incredible character trait that I need to work on.  You know who is a cool cucumber though? For shiz it is Barack Obama.  I think he may be the only one in America who doesn't have hate spewing out of him at this point.  I am waiting to see if he snaps.  I mean seriously everyone is losing their minds! Absolutely everyone.  I feel like America needs a really good cry and a hug.

Submitted by L16 on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 15:57
 

L16, Thanks. That is very

L16,

Thanks. That is very kind.  I've enjoyed posts from many people on here, on both sides of the issues.

I think I'm struggling with the fact that I was sure that they meant it when they said that this would be a more civil campaign this time around.

But what would all of those pundits do if they weren't paid to be indignant and outraged?  It's their only skillset. 

We would have all of those outraged pundits out of work, shuffling around cloaked in their righteous indignation, the outraged pundit industry in chaos since manufactured outrage is propping up the value of overall outrage right now.  It would be an outrage recession and that would be...,um, bad?

Okay, I'll stop now.  I need to step away from the computer for awhile (half the board sighs in relief).  Wake me up when McCain comes on. 

Oh wait, McCain is already working the pre-speech circuit.  Here's the headline that I just pulled from the feed:

McCain vows to end partisan rancor in Washington

 

Someone might want to tell Palin, Thompson and Guiliani.  I don't think they got that memo.

Submitted by miteegirl on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 16:46
 

Thanks everyone!

 And thank you, Semicolon, for your comments. But I wonder, and maybe I am completely wrong about this, are the young couple getting married because of their decision, or are they being forced to because of their parents, most notably Sarah Palin's political career and reputation?

I admit, I have very negative views on marriage (my friends who read this are probably nodding their heads and laughing) but while I would rather a child be born in wedlock, I simply wonder if these kids are too young. Do they love each other enough to make / take those vows seriously? I feel a bit sorry for this dude - I'm pretty sure that his thought process during his relationship was to have fun, not have an instant family at 18. Maybe it is not really worth it for the child for their parents to be married - maybe it is just better for Bristol to raise the child on her own instead of being trapped in a situation that is not right for her - her parents maybe, but not her.

Maybe it is none of my business!! 

 

Contributing Editor - Race, Ethnicity & Culture

Writing is Fighting: www.lainad.typepad.com

 

Submitted by lainad on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 15:13
 

Business is Business

Nice article, Lainad.

This whole Palin thing has clearly thrown EVERYONE for a loop, and people are scrambling left and right to spin things they didn't think they were going to have to deal with.

The fact of the matter is that now that Sarah Palin has been selected to potentially become the first female U.S. Vice President, and then, most likely, the first female PotUS, everything about her needs to be washed clean. So.. Naturally, people are going to make illogical stretches and bend reality in order to convince themselves and hopefully all of the voting public that the Emperor actually DOES have clothes on.

They don't have the luxury of speaking poorly of Bristol Palin, because it would reflect poorly on Sarah Palin and then reflect poorly on John McCain. There's the business of securing an election at hand, which is way more important than fairly criticizing people, to the writers you're talking about in your post.

The thing about this is that this is ANOTHER amazing stumbling block for the Republicans. Besides not selecting any one of myriad more qualified women as a running mate, they now have to damage-control images of her daughter which feature drinking, guns and partying.

Regardless of how they spin it, the VP position is very important in case the President is no longer able to serve. The President is going to need to be able to "control stuff". The Democrats are going to have a field day with this, just like Lynne Spears' parenting book deal went out the window after TWO of the daughters she parented ended up rather pregnant, rather unmarried and rather publicly discussed.

So this is why they have to spin this situation. To speak negatively of the Palin situation implies that she can't control her own kids. If she can't control her kids, how can she be expected to run the country, just in case?

Is it fair? No. Is it hypocritical for people to criticize the same situation differently when it happens to different people? Yes. At this point, business is business, and they have to roll with McCain's choice and make the best of it.

~ Bill
I blog at billcammack.com

Submitted by Bill Cammack on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 15:20
 

Thanks For Sharing Your Very Personal Story

Thank you, thank you for pointing out every bit of hypocriscy about the whole Bristol Palin pregnancy.  I've been thinking about this for days and spewing about it to anyone who would listen, because it's just so obvious.

If Barack Obama's 17 year old daughter was unmarried and five months pregnant, does any honest person really think that she would be treated with the same warm and fuzzy kid gloves the Republican Party is using for Bristol Palin?  Even if it was announced that Obama's 17 year old was marrying the father of her baby?

No, she would be vilified. 

For proof, just look at how Michelle Obama's been treated.  Remember Michelle as Barack's "Baby Mama?"  And she's Obama's wife, not his 17 year old pregnant and unmarried daughter.

It's times like these that the Republican party, their right wing religious fanatics, and their "fair and balanced" shills, can make me quite ill.

Megan Smith
BlogHer Contributing Editor, TV/YouTube
Megan's Minute: Quirky Commentary Around The Clock

Submitted by Megan Smith on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 17:25
 

More thanks

I've been fuming about all the points you both made, especially that "Baby Mama" bullshit. The lack of respect accorded to a grown, accomplished woman is disgusting on its own, yet contrasted with how extra respectful everyone has been of this situation, it just illustrates the true lows of our culture and its abuse of race when it suits the powers that be.

Suzanne Reisman, Contributing Editor - Feminism & Gender
Campaign for Unshaved Snatch (CUSS) & Other Rants

Submitted by Suzanne Reisman on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 19:12
 

Best Palin headline yet!!!!!

I'm not  gonna vote, I'm not even American, and I'm apologising in advance for interrupting this very serious thread, but I felt the need to share the following headline:

Palin pregnancy helps turn up heat on teenage buns in ovens

 That is a FOR REAL headline on a FOR REAL newspaper website.

 Please continue with your regularly scheduled political discussion.

I think I have a recipe for that...

Submitted by kazari on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 19:17
 

Ouch!

Yes, kazari, that is a clever headline. But incorrect (though unintentionally), I think. Hopefully it is the owners of the ovens who are teenagers, not the buns in them. (Imagine that delivery! LOL)

 

Six Impossible Things Before Breakfast

Submitted by Yvette Perry on Fri, 09/05/2008 - 09:00
 

Excellent!

Laina, I enjoyed the personal side of this story/article and your cogency on the Palin pregnacy issue.  I believe you'll appreciate Jon Stewart's clips on the hypocrisy going around. :-)  The Rove and Bill O'Reilly parts really got me.

Nordette is a Contributing Editor with BlogHer.com whose personal blog is hosted on another site at this link.

Submitted by Nordette on Thu, 09/04/2008 - 19:52
 

Bravo!

I enjoyed the issues you raised and  the discussion surrounding your post. I have no brillant insights, but as someone who has worked at numerous health agencies in urban environments, (including a 0-3 clinic)  there are definate double standards applied to young women/teens of color having babies. This includes the medical community as well. It is unfortunate and unfair, but your observation is accurate.

I also share your thoughts on teen marriage. Teens have unprotected sex and do other high risk behaviors because they can have difficulty making appropriate decisions for themselves. More and more developmental  research is determining that there is a wider gap than previously believed and this complicates all sorts of issues; when can someone really stand trial as an adult? What should be the legal age for drinking, voting, or being allowed to sign up for the military?  So, can a teen really be expected to make a good marital partnership decision?  

Because I take a systems psychological approach, I do believe that families live out patterns. This is mostly done subconsciously and sometimes it is not, but I think if we as a country want to reduce teen or unplanned pregnancies we need to do way more education about the "why'"; not just safe sex practices.

 

 

Submitted by Debra Collins on Fri, 09/05/2008 - 07:02
 

The missing link

I agree that there has been a lot of hypocrisy surrounding this pregnancy issue. However, I think a missing piece of the conversation involves economics.

Some conservatives will say that it is not (minority) unwed childbearing that is objectionable, but the "taxpaying public" having to pick up the tab for these poor choices. Now there are all sorts of problems with that stance as well, but it at least illustrates the way in which economics have always been tied to the public stance on childbearing by women of color--particularly African American women. Of course, in different times, these same healthy, young (and yes--unwed, since they were not allowed to wed) Black women would have been encouraged to bear children. In fact, their continued productivity was necessary to the productivity of the young nation. (Similarly, at other times there have been calls for more White childbearing, for example out of fears of non-Whites becoming too populous, with reproduction by the White and genetically fit being tied to "patriotic duty"...)

Many have written on this far more eloquently than I could ever express. It is jsut important for us to remember in our conversations about race, class, familial status and reproduction that money is tied up in all this very tightly.

Six Impossible Things Before Breakfast

Submitted by Yvette Perry on Fri, 09/05/2008 - 08:59
 

If Bristol was Obama's daughter

If Bristol was Obama's daughter I don't think that everyone would be so set on making sure that her pregnancy stayed a "private matter". Although Obama has taken the high road and made it clear that families are not fair game during the election, I can't help but think that if one of Obama's daughters were old enough to be sexually active and were in Bristol's shoes, people would not be so easy on them. They would become one of the stereotypical "welfare queens" that you speak about in your post. Maybe it's just me...or maybe other people feel that way too.

And btw Laina, good idea to reach out to your niece. She'll need people in her corner who love her and support her now more than ever.

~Dannie P

"When you're walking in your purpose the universe will conspire for your success."

Check out my blog "Clearly Danielle" at http://clearlydanielle.blogspot.com/

Submitted by danniep29 on Fri, 09/05/2008 - 16:31
 

great post

You hit so many great points.  It's not that white people have it easy when their teens get knocked up, it depends on where they are from.  If they are Southern teens, then they  get the banjo music and questions about incest.  I do agree that in general, "minorities" are treated more like trash though.  You mentioned the push for Norplant and whatnot, but don't forget that there was a time when there was an attempt at sterilization of black women in the US.  Through the water.  It's not a conspiracy theory, it's a flat out conspiracy that took place. 

~Kelly

http://www.30somethingandsearching.today.com/

Submitted by keyster94 on Fri, 09/05/2008 - 19:18
 

Amen

I am one of those evangelical Christians of whom you speak in this entry.  However, I spotted the hypocrisy about the Palin scandal as soon as the news broke last week.  I have maintained, somewhat to my online detriment, my position that Gov. Palin should not be the VP nominee.  Not only does she lack experience (esp. on foreign policy), but she needs to step down and take care of her family.  If she did, Miss Bristol might not have gotten pregnant in the first place.

FTR, I'm registered Independent, and am leaning Libertarian this fall.  I have become increasingly frustrated with the GOP over the past 4 years and this latest uproar/attempt at cover-up is one of the nails in the coffin.  

 

Submitted by jrgalluzzo on Sat, 09/06/2008 - 09:56
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